S4 EP 9 When Caregiving Costs You Everything: How to Stop Losing Your Health, Money, and Future While Caring for a Loved One

Welcome back to the *Caregiver Secrets Podcast*—your go-to haven for all things caregiving! Whether you’re a seasoned caregiver or just stepping into this role, you’re in the right place. This is where we swap real-life stories, dish out practical tips, and sprinkle in a whole lot of encouragement to help you navigate the beautiful, messy, and deeply rewarding world of caring for loved ones. So grab your favorite drink, take a deep breath, and know this: you’re not alone. We’re in this together, celebrating the wins, tackling the challenges, and building a community rooted in compassion and support.

 

Before we dive in, a quick reminder: while we’re here to inspire and inform, this podcast isn’t a substitute for professional medical, financial, or health advice. Always consult the experts for your specific needs. My job is to cheer you on, share insights, and remind you that *you’ve got this*. The rest? That’s up to you. Now, let’s roll up our sleeves and get started—because caregiving is a journey best traveled together!Today I have the perfect story to help us explore this topic.

James had been caring for his wife, Margaret, for five years. Once a vibrant woman with a laugh that could light up a room, Margaret had been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s in her early 60s. At first, it was just small things—forgetting where she put her keys, asking the same question twice—but over time, the disease took more and more from her. As the years passed, James found himself slipping into a routine of total devotion. He monitored her medications, helped her bathe, dressed her, and prepared every meal.

But there was something James didn’t talk about. He didn’t talk about the loneliness. He didn’t talk about the resentment that sometimes bubbled up late at night when exhaustion took hold. He didn’t talk about how, even though Margaret was still with him, he felt like he had lost his partner. And he definitely didn’t talk about how caregiving had completely drained his savings.

The financial weight of caregiving is a burden few people discuss, and yet it’s one of the biggest stressors family caregivers face. The costs of medical supplies, home modifications, medications, and professional respite care add up quickly. Many caregivers, like James, find themselves dipping into their retirement savings, cutting back on their own healthcare, and working less to be available for their loved ones. Over time, this financial strain creates a stress that quietly erodes their well-being.

According to a report by the National Alliance for Caregiving, family caregivers spend an average of $7,000 a year on out-of-pocket expenses. But the true cost isn’t just money—it’s missed opportunities, career sacrifices, and the emotional toll of never feeling financially secure. Many caregivers put their own futures at risk, often without realizing it, until it’s too late.

James never thought of himself as someone who would struggle with money. He had worked as a mechanic for 40 years, saved diligently, and always planned to travel with Margaret in their golden years. But as her needs grew, his ability to work full-time shrank. The house needed safety modifications—grab bars in the bathroom, a hospital bed in the living room. Home health aides were expensive, but he needed a break. Each expense chipped away at the nest egg they had spent decades building.

Then, one evening, as he sat at the kitchen table staring at a stack of unpaid medical bills, James realized something: if he didn’t make a change, he would lose everything. Not just his financial security, but his peace of mind. He had spent years taking care of Margaret, but he had neglected himself.

The first step to regaining control was acknowledging the problem. James reached out to a local caregiver support group and learned about financial assistance programs he hadn’t even considered. He discovered that he qualified for respite care grants, which allowed him to take breaks without breaking the bank. He connected with a financial advisor who helped him restructure his budget so he could stretch his savings further. Most importantly, he realized that asking for help wasn’t a weakness—it was survival.

If you’re a caregiver struggling financially, know that you are not alone. There are resources available to help you, but you have to take the first step in seeking them out. Here are a few key strategies to protect your financial well-being while still giving your loved one the best care possible:

1. Understand what financial assistance is available. Many caregivers don’t realize that Medicare, Medicaid, and local government programs offer help. Some states have cash assistance programs for caregivers, and there are nonprofit organizations that provide grants.
2. Set financial boundaries. It’s easy to keep spending on medical equipment, home care, and comfort items, but budgeting is critical. Prioritize essential expenses and explore cost-effective alternatives.
3. Look into long-term care insurance. If your loved one has a policy, now is the time to use it. If not, it’s worth considering for yourself to avoid future financial strain.
4. Explore part-time or remote work options. Many companies offer flexible work arrangements for caregivers. If you’ve had to cut back on hours, look for ways to earn income from home.
5. Have the hard conversations. Talk to family members about contributing financially. If siblings or relatives can’t offer hands-on help, perhaps they can support in other ways.

One of the most important things you can do is shift your mindset. In my book Get Risen, I write, "I Honor My Goals with Focus and Time. I Live as if My Life Is Divine." Your life, your dreams, and your financial stability matter just as much as the person you’re caring for. You were never meant to sacrifice everything—your well-being, your savings, your future—to be a good caregiver. A good caregiver is also a good steward of their own life.

James learned this the hard way, but he made the necessary changes before it was too late. He stopped trying to do everything alone. He reached out for financial guidance. He set limits. And in doing so, he found that he could still care for Margaret without completely losing himself in the process.

If you’re feeling overwhelmed by the financial weight of caregiving, take one small step today. Look up financial assistance programs. Have an honest conversation with a loved one. Speak to a professional who can help. You don’t have to do this alone.

I’d love to hear from you. Have you faced financial struggles as a caregiver? What has helped you navigate this challenge? Share your story in the comments or email me. And if this episode resonated with you, don’t forget to subscribe and share it with another caregiver who might need it today.

And don’t forget to join our Facebook community at bit.ly/CaregiverSecretsOnFacebook, where we share stories, tips, and encouragement. Together, we can build a village of support and make this journey a little lighter.

Finally, I’d love for you to grab a free copy of my book, Get Risen. It’s written by a family caregiver for caregivers, and you can get it at bit.ly/GetRisen.

Take care, and remember: you are not alone. Keep going, and keep rising. And remember, You’ve got this!